Bullying is a pattern of aggressive behavior meant to hurt and cause discomfort to another person for an extended period of time. Almost always, bullies have more power than their victims. This power comes from physical size, strength, status, and support within their group, creating fertile ground for bullying to develop and thrive, and even become a standardized form of behavior of the physically stronger towards the weaker members of a group. Bullying is most common, but it is not limited to school. It can happen anywhere where people interact with each other for a longer period of time.

Definition of Bullying

Adult people used to think that kids fought only to be best friends in the end. Bullying also gets inflamed by common gender stereotypes. For example, the saying “boys will be boys” as well as the collocation “girly girls” – all this can lead to a development of a state of mind where it’s, in lack of a better word, “normal” for someone to be a bully. However, all this can be taken care of at home, where the problem tends to originate in the first place.

But, how to draw the ling between bullying and your regular ol’ teasing kids are used to? The severity and duration are the prime indicators, showing that most cases of bullying are prolonged over a longer period of time, exhausting the victim, and in the end causing irreparable damage to one’s psyche. Young children don’t have the social skills adults have. These are acquired traits, by observing the attitudes of grownups and their behavior, kids get influenced into becoming emphatic, kind individuals through positive role-modeling.

Causes of Bullying

It is really important that adults finally realize that bullying is not a normal, common part of childhood – no more stories of toughening up, especially when talking about boys. Instead, adults should teach children about assertiveness, how to help one another and not to make fun of  someone different. How to stand up for themselves, and how to have more self esteem – these are good traits, because bullies are looking for easy prey, someone who cannot defend themselves and someone who doesn’t think highly of themselves.

The personality of a bully develops in childhood and it is usually caused by various outside factors. It can be linked with how the parents  get along and it can be a response to different social situations in school and in the community. Lack of warmth at home, too much or too little discipline and physical punishment may contribute. An imbalance of power can occur if children are raised in non-accepting homes. Their peers would appear either superior or inferior to them. This is usually connected to physical appearance, the family’s religious views or their social and economic status.

The child who bullies does so to gain attention and secure friends. It gives him/her a false sense of power. Having a negative influence can sometimes compel physically stronger children to feel more powerful over the weak. The fact that weaker people have less self esteem is what gives bullies their sense of domination.

Bullies sometime think that bullying is acceptable and think that acting in such a way will lead to respect and advancement inside a certain group. When a bully grows up, there are some serious chances that they will become a criminal of some sort. The reasoning behind this is that bullying is a borderline criminal activities, and if not stopped, a bully will think that something even worse can pass unpunished.

Where Bullying Happens

Bullying can occur at different places besides in school. Workplace bullying is also prominent, because it involves a power play of some kind, making people that are lower in the hierarchy more prone to abuse.

For long term jobs, the bully is the manager, co-worker or subordinate, or a client.

Short term jobs, such as performing arts, agriculture or construction, where the engager, gang master or supervisor has complete power over workers, can be a bit more dangerous.

In the army, religious organisations and the media, well, you can only read about what happens there.

At home, there are all kinds of bullying and this is something that should never happen. However, you can worry together about the your landlords, their agents, various debt collectors – they have a special kind of bullying pattern.

Neighbours can also present a problem.

In public schools, hospitals, convalescent homes, care homes, residential homes, as well as on the street, a trained eye can witness all kinds of bullying.

Some of the things mentioned above can easily be viewed as harassment and assault and you should know that the list is incomplete.

Bullying in Schools

Bullying in school can happen on various occasions. There are cases where only one student is doing his or her best to inflict any kind of pain towards someone else, and there are cases when a group of students is in question. This kind of abuse can be physical in nature, but it can also be psychological, and sometimes emotional. This emotional pain is actually most common today. The problem is that parents have a hard time recognizing this issue. The reasons for this vary almost as much as its types.

The bully (or bullies) may have self-esteem issues and would only feel better about themselves by picking on someone who is weaker and less powerful. Students may develop a herd mentality and pick on a child who does not conform to what they view as normal. Students bully other students so as to be seen as “cool” and to avoid being bullied themselves. In some cases, bullies are being abused at home and they take out their anger on one or more students they deem most likely to “take it” without standing up for themselves. They might also bully students with healthy homes out of their envy for normal and happy lives.

Pack bullying is when a group of – usually – older children, target one or more victims. This form of bullying can relate to physical contact or emotional scars. Cyber bullying is connected to this form as well. It lasts longer than real life bullying and can be the more damaging because it can lead to dysthymia or sometimes suicide.

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